Thanks for bringing some nuance to this complicated and emotionally charged topic. I’ve got two perhaps contradictory reactions.

1) what you call the African-American approach to consent was also the white American approach until about a decade ago. Before then, anyone who explicitly asked for consent would’ve been considered a socially clueless fool. You were supposed to judge consent by body language and voice tones, not by specific verbal permission. You’re right to object to outsiders superimposing their culture on you. It’s a bit like when woke white people came up with the word “Latinx“, which has no connection whatsoever to the linguistic structure of Spanish, and which the vast majority of Hispanic people never use. But this requirement of verbal consent was not white people imposing their culture on black people. It was self-appointed woke cultural police superimposing their values upon everyone, Black and white.

2) That being said, I think these new rules appeal to me more than the old system. Many years ago when I was still in the dating game, I was constantly confused and frustrated, wondering what my date expected, and having no way to be sure I’d guessed correctly. If I were dating now, I would welcome being able to simply ask, and not being forced to guess.